Get Old, and things change

So this is my first official Blog, since i refuse to go to sleep. It seems as if i have been trapped these past few months in a weird stage in my life. I have always felt old, independent, and mature (in imortant things) for the most part, but now really dont like getting older.

Things change.

Friends. School. Life. Career. Relationships. Metabolism. Finances. Style. Responsibility. And the list goes on. It isn't like i am not up to the challenge it just boils down to that i fear change, i guess. The dynamic that i have had with relationships are what bothers me the most. I guess when something changes, i question if it was real or not in the first place. I think i am pretty sensitive, but have things of value to say. I want things to stay as they used to be with my close friends, but also want to move to the next stage of my life. Two different ideals pulling on my life. Finding a compromise is the hard part. School. In 3 weeks, I will not be in school or have the thought of attending in the fall, for the first time in 18 years. This is a pretty significant time i think. Now i have to figure out the career that will help me achieve what i want out of life, influencing relationships, responsibility, finances etc...and just for fun. It sucks having to watch what you eat and set aside time to excercise. Im used to being a hyper little kid, who can eat whatever and not gain a pound. Those days are slowly fading, so i need to put forth a better effort. One problem, IM LAZY.

Thanks for reading. Tell me what you think.